I've Got A Chicken And I'm Gonna Use It!
My first thought was 'take it across the road, feed it on corn', stuff like that. I called him back and told him.
'No', he says 'it's dead'.
'You killed it already?'
'No, it was dead when I bought it!'
Ah, an eating chicken. So, I told him how to roast a chicken. Then he wanted to know how to make stock. So I told him. And gravy. And cheese sauce. Sheesh! 'Twas the same with me when I'd left home. Always phoning my mother. How do you make pease pudding? Roast potatoes? Yorkshire puddings? Boil an egg? Etc. This was in the days when cookery was not a popular obsession and food was something you got from the local fish 'n' chip shop. There were a few cookbooks available, but not the plethora that we have these days.
Anyhoo, it's always better to get the real gen from your parents.
Coming soon 'Keefieboy's English CookBook'. Probably not.